Well, it's Wednesday. Wheee! Not, really, I'm just incredibly frustrated at the moment. Not exactly frustrated, just irritated I guess.

Do you guys wanna hear it?

No? Well too bad, because I'm venting anyway.

Okay, first off, before I begin, I would like to say thank-you to our Guest Speaker...you're a great and funny guy, and have a powerful message that was really touching. So thanks very much.

Today in Chemistry, I had to sit by one girl, Sarah. I didn't mind at first. I haven't really met her or anything (I guess she's sort of popular), but I don't pass judgement easily. I guess, she REALLY doesn't like me, but that's totally okay. Well, not even two mintues into the lecture, a guy in our class said something incredibly insiteful *sarcastic voice rings out*...it was just one of those things you should have thought before you talked kind of deals. Yes, we all have our moments, some more frequently than others. Anyway, I said something such as "That was insiteful" or rather...didn't mean anything by it, but she turned and said to me - "Why do always have to say you're so smart?" I merely replied "I didn't say I was smart." But, it's just things like that that annoy the heck out of me - jumping to conclusions and passing judgements. And then, she made a comment about my jacket. "Is that real fur? Because if it is you're an animal killer, and I hate animal killers. They're stupid and mean." Again, extremely annoying. And even if it isn't real (I honestly have no clue), I wouldn't have been the one to kill the rabbit or whatever. I was just like "Oh yes, I went out and killed a rabbit just so I could make this jacket to annoy you." Finally, she just riped my assignment from me and looked at my answers without saying anything. I said "You're welcome," and she just said "I didn't say thank-you." That made me extremely mad, so I took my and her assignment and said "Don't do that - ever." Wow, I really sound awful here, but my God, seriously.

Then we got our tests back. And appearently the class didn't do extremely well. The teacher said that the person with the hightest score was somewhere in the third row. I'm in the third row and everyone just glared at me. I felt like a friggin' idoit. I HATE it when people do that. Because in fact, I didn't get the highest score on the test and I don't really care one way or another.

The fact is, I don't care! and Don't question me either. Especially Chirstal, because in gym today, I told Chrissy I didn't really care about homework or the test (because I don't at all, seriously) and Christal HAD to second guess me, saying "oh yeah, you care and you know it." That my friend, is a major pet peeve of mine. When I say something, don't freaking second guess me. I know what I said, I always speak the truth. When people do that, especially Chirstal, it makes me feel that I'm not worth anything more than that piece of gum on the bottom of your shoe.

There's a whole lot more...got your seat belt on?

People over estimate me way too much. Just because I respect and love my family, doesn't mean I'm Miss Conformity. Just because I have a good head on my shoulders doesn't mean I'm Miss Conformity. Just because I try to be nice doesn't mean I'm Miss Conformity. Just Because I'm happy doesn't mean I'm Miss Conformity. The list goes on and on. I have so many flaws, I couldn't even begin to describe them. I'm NOT perfect, can you see that? Can't you just accept me the way I want to be? Why does everything have to be so normal? We're ALL different...that shouldn't matter. People think they know everything about me. People critique and criticize me when they don't have a freaking clue who I am. I'm happy with who I am. I'm not who I am just to be who I am, but because it's who I am. 

In other words, I didn't dye my hair as a call for attention. I don't do anything I do to get attention. I do it because it's what I like. People often ask me "Why are you so smart?" Why are you so talented?" Why are you so pretty?" And I never can answer those questions. People just don't know me...and yet they think they do. I'm tired of it! And in the end, I think they're jealous of how happy I am...I have dreams and a huge goal that I'm working my butt off to achieve. And they have to laugh at that because they're scared of me. Here's a girl who will grit her teeth and charge into something headfirst without batting an eye, and God help anyone who stands in her way. Here's a girl who will fight ANYONE single handedly if they say she can't do something. If the whole world's against her, she'll still go for her dreams. And because of that, they're scared.

Just like at Sunday's People's Choice Awards. Johnny won Best Actor, and I enjoyed his accpetence speech very much (via satelittle). But then you have these people who want to make something of it so they said that it and his apperance was alarming and disturbing. What a bunch of crap. Seriously! He speech was the most entertaining there. It was hilarious and different and totally Johnny. That's it. Heck, when I make speeches, you thought that was alarming and disturbing, I will probably deliver the whole thing in a German accent or something. It's just different, and different is awesome. Great speech Johnny! I'll get it a transcript up on the site or something.

Thanks for your time, ya'll.

Vianne

LOST  is on tonight!